Mock Mind Reading

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A very amusing mock demonstration of mind reading can be given by a couple of boys, one disguised as a "professor" and the other as a "medium," or "mind reader." The professor comes on and says that he has wonderful powers of conveying his thoughts to his medium without any secret apparatus such as looking glasses, radio, and the like. He then sets the medium in position and pretends to mesmerize him, and concludes by blindfolding one eye. The following dialogue explains how the thing works:

 Professor: "Now, Zozo, how many apples have I got in my hand? If you guess them right you can have them BOTH."

 Medium: "Two."

 Professor: "What is this little thing in my hand?" (Rings a bell, or blows a whistle, etc.)

 Medium: "A bell."

 Professor: "Which foot am I standing on? Remember now, you have only two guesses."

 Medium: "Right foot."

 Professor: "No, no, try again."

 Medium: "Left foot."

 Professor: " Quite right--isn't he marvelous? Now, I have something round my finger--what is it?"

 Medium: "Dirt."

 Professor: "Certainly not--try again."

 Medium: "A ring."

 Professor: "Deucedly clever! I knew you would like him. What have I here?" (Holding up a comb) "Comb on, now, comb on."

 Medium: "Let me think--a comb!"

 Professor: "How old is this lady?"

 Medium: "Don't she remember? Then why ask me?"

 Professor: "And what is this?" (Fans medium from a distance)

 Medium: "A fan."

 Professor: "What color is this lemon?"

 Medium: "Yellow!"

 Professor: "Marvelous!"

 Professor (writing on the blackboard the figure 6): "Now what is this number, Zozo?" (Hits Zozo over the head with a rolled-up newspaper five times).

 Medium: "Five." (Professor hits him again) "No, six." Professor then writes the figures 4, 3, 2, 1, and picks up a big mallet, at the same time rolling up his sleeves. Zozo starts to rush off but is dragged back with great difficulty. 

Professor (pointing to figure 4): "What is that?"

No answer at first.

Then the Professor begins to make a golf swing and calls to Zozo.

 Professor: "Caddie, tell those people to look out."

 Medium: "Fore!"

Professor then points to the figure 1, and bangs with a mallet once.

 Professor: "What figure is this, Zozo?"

 Medium: "Seven."

 Professor: "No, no; try again."

 Medium: "Seven."

 Professor: "No, no, no; have another try."

 Medium: "Seven."

 Professor (altering the one into 7 by putting a stroke across the top-: "All right, all right, have it your own way."

This can be carried on, with a little--ingenuity, as long as desired, and causes a lot of fun.

See Also:

Mind Reading

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